Why I Shouldn't Go to Hell, by Donald Trump

There are three things I've trained myself to do,

The first thing is to always tell the truth,

I always tell lies--they're part of what's true,

I'm not a faker--I show I'm uncouth.


The second is to always make things new,

I'll give my Wharton profs credit for that,

You gotta have a new turn of the screw,

If not, you're toast, you're old Fred in his hat.


The third thing--always get snobs to hate me,

Doing that gets the people on my side,

I don't want a professor to date me,

I want you on my roller coaster ride.


I've made myself what people really are,

I've gotten Oscars.  I'm a superstar.  




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